"The sparkles are on the fur!! The sparkles are on the fur!!"

This is the story of the hunt for my wedding gown. And it was a hunt, truly. We even wound up with a fox in the end (explanation to come later...keep reading).
The Austin Experience: I started looking for my gown this summer, when Gina and Jenny (two of my closest girlfriends), took me on a day-long gown-shopping adventure. We went to several places here in Austin, the first of which was a salon that carried only Vera Wang and Reem Acra gowns. Needless to say, if you're looking to stay on a budget, that was a bad place to start. We found that I have a taste for Reem Acra. In fact, after trying on several Reem gowns and falling in love with this designer, the other salons we visited took all of 45 mintues because they didn't carry Reem Acra or anything similar (like Kenneth Pool or Amsale). My new battle cry was "No Reem? No way!" The amazing part of this little trip is that Jenny was actually there with us for part of the day. Jenny had, not two days earlier, finished the Texas bar exam (which, I might add, she passed!), and was eloping with her husband-to-be the following week. I was amazed that she would take the time to come with me to look for gowns when she had her own wedding coming up! It's hard to find friends like that! I'm very lucky. But on with the story...
The New York City Experience: Later in the summer, about a week later in fact, I went up to New York with Kenny to serve as Jenny's witness for her wedding to Ryan (an adventure in itself- be sure to ask them about it at the wedding!). Since I had a day or two to kill before the ceremony, Kenny's mom, Adrienne, being the fashion guru that she is, scheduled appointments for me at Bergdorf Goodman, Saks, the Vera Wang flagship salon, and...the Reem Acra salon!!!!! I was in heaven, but again, these places are very, very bad for someone trying to keep within a budget. For every expensive gown I tried on, I figured that was one less course our guests would eat at dinner. I later decided that I would pay for the gown myself so that the wedding guests would not go home hungry. One side note on this excursion: Jenny, being the ever-amazing friend that she is, came with Adrienne and me (remember, this is less than 24 hours before her wedding)! That's dedication.
So there we were at the Reem Acra salon- my goddess of wedding gowns. I must have tried on half the store- well, not really, but if you've ever tried on wedding gowns you know it takes more than just slipping into the dress. There are hooks everywhere, multiple zippers, buttons, and the ever-lovely big orange clips that they use to make the dress fit those who are smaller than the sample size. I'm sure it makes for a fun time for the groom, trying to get his bride out of her gown on their wedding night...Kenny should count his blessings that my gown only has two zippers. (Too much information? Nah, we're all adults here, right?) I think they like to hook the bride in good and tight so if she becomes Bridezilla at any moment, its just one more hook here and a zip there, and the gown becomes a very lovely straightjacket. Hopefully I won't need that.
So at the Reem Acra Salon I found a wonderful gown called Affectionate (Reem names all of her gowns) that I really loved, and Adrienne loved as well. It was very frou-frou, with lace and beading on the train, lace insets on the bodice, and dual tones in the bodice and on the train in "champagne and ivory." Nothing in the bridal world is ever "pink" or "off-white". Our sales lady, Holly, said it was "faaaaaabulous". Holly really topped off the whole New York experience- she wore all black, had jet black hair with a trendy haircut, and had dark rimmed glasses that were very hip. I couldn't have asked for more that day- it was a blast. I did, however, leave the salon with sticker shock, wondering how I would ever pay for this gown. I figured once I did buy one, I would have to sign the contract in blood and hand over my first born son when the time came. I'd later visit the salon to find my son in tight hipster pants telling women they looked faaaabulous in their gowns. And the circle of life goes on...
The San Antonio Experience: This is where my friend Kati, my maid of honor, came in to the picture. She came down for a visit in August, and because we only had a weekend together, we had a packed schedule. We made an appointment at Julian Gold, a salon in San Antonio. They carry....Reem Acra!! But I swore to myself I'd try on other designers. Kati and I had also planned an afternoon of tubing down the Guadalupe river, which involves floating lazily down the river with an innertube- one for me, one for Kati, and one for our cooler of beer. Needless to say it was a weird combination of plans- trying on couture gowns followed shortly by floating in a river drinking beer. So we were dressed for tubing when we arrived at Julian Gold- flip flops, little skirts over our bathing suits, sunglasses, etc. We were not the epitome of fashion. Nevertheless the women there were very nice and did not judge us by our unpolished appearance. They just didn't know what they were talking about with their gowns. They told me that one of the Reem Acra dresses that I had tried on not one month earlier was discontinued. No...I had just tried it on and was told they still make it. She also didn't know what collection it was from. I realized at that moment I knew WAY too much about Reem Acra.
Funny story- I tried on a really nice Monique Lhullier gown. Good thing I didn't choose that one because it turns out Adrienne is eyeing it for Lauren, Kenny's sister, as a bridesmaid dress (copied and made in the cranberry red they will be wearing).
This is yet another interesting difference between North and South- first of all, the sister of the bride or groom stands apart from the bridesmaids as someone different, and is allowed to wear something that makes her stand out. We don't do that down here- if you're a bridesmaid, you're a bridesmaid. Even if you're someone's sister. And I think all Southern brides formally ask their sisters or sisters-in-law-to-be to be a bridesmaid- it isn't something assumed. I guess this is to allow for the potential of some Gone With The Wind-style drama that might come between sisters. Who knows. Anyway, I remember asking Lauren to be a bridesmaid, and now I wonder if she thought that was strange. However, I think the Northern tradition of setting apart the sister of the bride/groom is nice, so I'll follow it. But I was not aware of it until a few weeks ago. You learn something new everyday, right?
The other big difference is how New Yorkers go all out on bridesmaid's dresses. This is the first time I've heard of someone copying a wedding dress to make it into a bridesmaid dress. Of course, it isn't made as fancy as the wedding dress because, let's face it, there should only be one person up there wearing a wedding gown, but it's definately a step up from what us Southerners are used to. The idea in the South it to make your bridesmaids look as crappy as possible so that you look great as the bride. I have two problems with this: first, it's not nice and I would never want my friends to look crappy for feel anything less than gorgeous. Secondly, all of my bridesmaids are gorgeous, so I would have a very hard time making them look crappy. It would just take way too much effort.
Anyway, Kati and I left that salon not so impressed. We continued on up to the river, floated in our tubes, and got drunk. It was great.
The Dallas Experience: Now, you may be asking, "Where is the most important lady of all in this picture- the Mother of the Bride?" I am saving the best for last. Not totally settled with what I found in Austin, San Antonio, or New York, and very much wanting to include my own mom in on this high priced adventure, I scheduled an appointment at the bridal salon at Neiman Marcus in Dallas this past October. This was the best trip yet. They had the dress I had tried on in New York, and I really thought I was going to buy it. In fact, while we waited to be escorted to the dressing suite, I stood by the rack and guarded this dress with all my might from other brides-to-be. I wore a look on my face that said, "Do not threaten my chances of trying this dress on. Do not buy this dress. I will kick your ass if you come any closer." It was like a mother protecting her young- this dress was my baby, and nobody was going to take it. Well, I quickly abandoned my "baby" when I saw another dress hanging in the dressing room. It had been left there by the previous bride. How could she leave it like that? It was beautiful! And, of course, it was a Reem Acra. At this point I had already given up liking any other designer.
My accomplices in this adventure were my mom, of course, and my best friend Gina. After loitering around looking at gowns for a few mintues, we were introduced to Judy. Judy is the BEST bridal sales specialist! She reminded me of my Granny (my dad's mom)- very nurturing, sweet, and just willing to spoil every bride that came across her path. So I tried on a couple of dresses, including the one I found in New York, and nothing really hit me. We saved the best for last- the dress that had been hanging in the dressing room. I put it on, and it was beautiful. Gina and my mom both loved it. Then Judy brought out a veil- long, simple, with Swarovski crystals arranged in a sunburst pattern on the veil- and put it on me, along with a tiara. Wow. It was the complete look. Then, she looked at us with a gleam in her eyes and says, "I have just the accessory for this gown." She returned a few minutes later with a white fox capelet. I put it on, and Gina and my mom immediately started screaming. I'm pretty sure people in the other parts of the store could hear us. We probably looked really silly- my mom was giggling uncontrollably, Gina was screaming, "The sparkles are on the fur! The sparkles are on the fur!" referring to how the white fur beneath the veil really made the crystals on the veil stand out, and I was just standing there giggling with them. Judy took a picture with a polaroid she had on hand, and gave it to me. It was great. For the next two months, the fox capelet was simply called "The Fox". But, it later became the source of much controversy. Keep reading...
I was pretty sure when I left that day that this was the gown I would later buy. I returned two months later, again with Gina and my mom, and this time accompanied by my mom's best friend Janice. Judy greeted us with open arms and that wonderful grandmotherly affection that she has. The four of us had a great time trying on the gown. The Fox, sadly, had been purchased. However, Judy later informed us that the buyer had decided to return it, and it was on its way back that day! It was fate telling me that The Fox must be mine.
Let me digress for a moment and tell you all about The Fox. Judy, my mom, and Gina were all for me wearing The Fox during the ceremony as a cover for my shoulders. I have to admit, it did look great- very dramatic. Very Hollywood. I felt like a movie star when I wore it. There were a few problems with wearing it during the ceremony, however. First, it was really freaking hot. I would definately be sweating up there, and that's not pretty. Secondly, it would cover up the back of my gown, which has very intricate beading and a very nice sweetheart back to it. Finally, when I told Adrienne about it, there was nothing but silence on her end of the phone, indicating she was less than pleased about the idea of me wearing it indoors. This is a perfect example of the little differences in culture between our two families- we just have different approaches to certain things. Nothing wrong with that, but it makes for interesting situations sometimes.
Having no need for fur in Texas, I was unaware of the ettiquette of wearing fur indoors. So, being the lawyerly type that I am, I researched this thrououghly. I called Holly at the Reem Acra salon: "Oh, Daaaahling, it would be faaaaahbulous! A winter wedding in New York with a white fox capelet- how romaaaaantic!" Holly was good to go. I called the fur department at Neiman Marcus and spoke to Peter- the man who would later sell me The Fox: "Oh Honey, it would be perfect. It's all the rage now to wear fur with your wedding gown." I'd have to agree with Peter- I've seen it everywhere in the fashion magazines. I spoke to someone in the fur department of a designer boutique here in Austin, who also said it is fine, and more than fine, en vogue. That was enough for me. I was convinced. However, Adrienne still was not. Who knows, maybe it's just a Long Island thing- no fur in the wedding ceremony. I decided this was not a fight worth fighting, especially since I did have hang-ups about how comfortable I would be in it and how it covered up the beading on my dress. I decided not to wear it in the ceremony.
The difficult part of this was that when Judy told us that The Fox was coming back, and even better, it was 60% off the original price, there was no way I could get around not buying it. My mom was pleading for it. Gina was begging me to buy it. So I caved. Maybe I won't wear it walking down the aisle, but what better accessory could a bride have as she's leaving the reception with her groom into a December New York night? It'll be faaaaahbulous. My mom is the one who actually bought it, so I guess I still have to pay her back.
Right now I'm still working on paying off the dress- don't worry, you'll all get to eat at the reception.